Alfred and Simone

hey..

life is so unpredictable. one moment u might be the happiest guy on earth, and the next thing u noe.. sumthing jus happened and it stripped and tore ur heart. u may be happy that u have the highest grades in class, only to find out the next few days that u fractured ur bones. or u got urself a girl fren and tell urself that this might actually "work out" but end up gettin disappointed and dumped by the one u thought was ur true love

u may think that this person that uve jus accepted to u be ur boyfriend is the one u get to spend with for d rest of ur life, only to find out that he has cancer and he cant be saved the next few months. well, shit happens, and it did to my beloved sister.

i got an sms from my sister today that she was leavin to ipoh and she borrowed one of my caps. so i called her, cos i was CONCERNED about which cap she took ( hahahaha im a loser) and i oso asked her why was she going back.. and she said she had to attend Alfreds funeral.

Alfreds gone.. sleepin peacefully during the last few breaths of his life. i wonder what would u actually think of when u noe ur gonna go; have i made enough money in my life? have i had the best things in life? am i going to heaven? or have i done my best to give my best to others? i wonder what was on his mind...

its a sad thing; the nicest guy my sister met, some1 i feel that was so strong and independent has to leave us. why do nice people tend to leave this life earlier? its not right to say life is unfair but sumtimes it is indeed very true...

i know that he was happy towards the end of his life, though he had to suffer so much putting on the tube and breathing through it, going through surgeries and having to see the doctor time after time. for some1 like him to have gone through that, withuot complainin as much as i noe i would if i was put into that situation, i reli look up to him.. his so strong. i reli dunno wat to say.. im glad in a way hes suffering came to an end :) seeing him not being able to tok anymore, only able to tell ppl wat he thinks by writin notes down and forced to breathe through a tube, it must be hard for him..

i noe i wouldnt be able to take it if i was him. yeah. i would be so mentally affected, i would think of commiting suicide. im sure most of us would. i would pity myself. i would cry so often i would want to be another person. but sometimes we cant choose certain things in our lives. some things cant be changed, and i guess we havta live with it and make d best out of it.

i would say that ive learnt something from this. apart from appreciating the ones u have, and u shud give urself to others and spend as much time as u want with them, i believe that i havta be strong. i cant be complanin so much anymore. life has its ups and downs, but look around. there are so many other ppl in this life who has to go through worse shits than u. alfreds definitely one of them.. im glad he had some1 like my sister to take care of him.

watchin my sister going to the hospital to see him everyday, takin care of him and all.. is the most admirable thing ive seen in my own eyes. never in my life have i seen with my very own eyes, such tremendous sacrifice someone has made for d other person. mayb ive never actually seen the world hahahaha but i noe that some1 like my sister to do all those things.. is definitely hard to find.

im so proud to be her brother( for once).. i reli do.. i guess ill always be there for her, as she is going through her hardest moments in life.. i cant do much, but i would try my very best to not make her feel lonely and all. thats all i can do... i hope she gets to read this..

bye