And when i got up from my sleep, the door knob was missing, my room table was not there, even my cupboard is somehow not built yet. And i realised that something was different; something not right has happened.

i got out of the room, and of all people, Dad was there. I told Dad whats wrong, and he agreed upon the fact that we had stepped back in time; the time that ive stepped on is many years back. I cant recall what year it is but definitely when i was younger.

I am not colourblind, but all i see is in black and white. strange isnt it? i started gettin worried. i asked dad, "whats going on?"

and he said, "its ok, son, ill take u back to where u belong."

so! we went to school. back in Ipoh. when i still living there (don't ask me how i suddenly got back there i don't know myself). i was walking to school with Dad, and really, this is so real. Everything around me looks not as advanced as now; the old Proton Wiras and Mini cars, the buildings looked less dirty compared to as it is now, everyone looked so happy and it was still safe to walk outside of ur home. The town was clean, so clean it feels as if the floor and buildings were washed and polished.

and so me and dad walked on... and we walk.. and walk.. and walk... then i see visions of my present bedroom. and everything was in color.

so i told dad, "this must be a dream"

and he said, "it can't be son. this is so real"

and so, i closed my eyes, took a deep breath and opened it up again. and everything was back to how it looked like again. new buildings were around. new cars, more people on the road but less smile on their faces, dirt everywhere on the floor.

it was indeed just a dream.. but it was so real. even dad was convinced it wasn't one, and he wouldnt believe that it is not.

he said that mayb he was jus so caught up with the present problems, he wans to go back to the past and relive the days where he could learn everything again.. mayb He wans us to look back at our past and look at our mistakes. yes, we want to relive those days, but those dreams are just reminisces that cant be turned back, those steps tat we once stepped foot on cant be step on again in the same time again.

i didnt know what to say. as in, what was all this for....

And Samuels name appear unto me.

People, in life have make mistakes. Never a day can u live without making God disappointed because we are made this way. Sin came to us the moment we stepped foot on this land. That no matter how uve lived ur live, whether it has been a failure, whether u think that u made so many mistakes is so unbearable. sometimes u jus want to turn back the time and redo the bad things u have done in a better way.

that, indeed is impossible. and u cant change d fact tat u can turn back the time, no matter how u wan to. things can change,like who u were last time and what u are now. who was ur best fren, who were ur close frens. or even how ur parents were better last time, worse now. uve never done those things that u never knew u might end up doing now.

but this is a word of encouragement for u all; that God never forsakes you. As time can change and everything else does, there is one definite thing that will never, ever change. and i came to realise that this is what God was trying to tell me.

i woke up and i started day dreaming. then tears were all over when those songs that were made to glorify him were played. it may not be a very deep testimony, or something very emotional. but this is just what i needed to hear all these while. that he will carry me thorough my failures. and i will finish this race.

so for those of u who think u are alone; think again. Because even if you want to, God will never leave u alone :)